It was my last day at school before surgery. I remember thinking what am I going to be like after surgery? The same? Different? I just had to wait to find out. My teacher told me, that if they let me keep the piece of my brain their removing bring it in a jar so you can show the class! I was like great! I wanted to see it! When I asked the anesthesiologist they said I couldn’t take it home, it was going to be sent to lab instead. The weekend before I remember writing a note to my parents saying I want my sister Haley to be with me at the hospital she has always helped me and I wanted her to be their with me when I would wake up after surgery. But, since it was a school night she couldn’t.
When the day was over, it was time to go home and start packing everything I needed for the hospital. I was ready for tomorrow.
The next morning, I had to get up at 6:00 and grab everything I needed for the hospital. Blankets, stuffed animals, coloring books etc.. My grandparents got up the same time we did to give me a hug goodbye and told me everything will go just fine.
My parents and I got in the car and drove over to Phoenix Children’s Hospital. When we got there I was starting to get butterflies in my stomach and nervous, while waiting for my mom to fill out all of these medical papers. I just sat there in silence waiting.
The nurse called us and showed us a room, where the neurosurgeon will come talk to us. He came in and I wanted to have a panic attack and say I didn’t want to do this. I was thinking back to all things that are going to happen to me, short term memory, therapy, missing school, and waiting 10 years to be fully recovered and some unknown affects. He stood up and told me the nurses will take me up to the OR after they get my blood drawn.
When I left the room the nurse rolled me away and I kept thinking in my head, I’m not gonna die, I’m not gonna die, everything’s going to be just fine…
When I left the room the nurse rolled me away and asked me, “Are you ready for your surgery?” and in my mind i was like nope. I asked her, “can we talk about something else?” She said sure! Then she just asked me where I go to school and what I like to do. She opened the doors into the operating room, and I saw all these machines everywhere, bright lights shining everywhere, it was a little nerve racking. I laid down, and the anesthesiologist told me “You are going to inhale some laughing gas to make you go to sleep.” I breathed in some of it and had a smile on my face, laughed a little, closed my eyes, and went to sleep.
Literally My Thoughts 